Ramanujan Redux

No. And yes.

I don’t really love anything about Berkeley. I mean, the weather’s nice, but it gets a little chilly–do you enjoy the occasional 50 degree night in July? The students find their own groups pretty quickly, so making new friends is largely dependent on the friends you make your freshman year. The food’s decent and diverse (it’s nice to have five Indian restaurants within a few blocks), but come on, is La Burrita all you can do for Mexican?

And as for professors, I’ve been underwhelmed. This might have something to do with choosing a slightly antiquated major (I love math, but I seldom meet a math major I want to coerce with) where it’s none too easy to find accessible professors and interesting research (they’re there, but you have to look hard, and after awhile you kind of give up when you realize you have no idea what they’re talking about).

It’s not a big deal for me; I’ve accepted those things and have to tried to expand my reach. But when you do that, something interesting begins to happen–you panic. You don’t know what’s coming next. You’re walking out into the dark. These are uncharted waters, and you have to be prepared to sink or swim for your life.

But slowly you find something else you like doing. And then something else. And maybe something you don’t like, and you eliminate it quickly. And you keep on trying new and new things, until you reach the place you want to be the legend you’re trying to pursue. You probably don’t get there now, or when you graduate, or even years after your house parties. But you know if you keep on pursuing it, you’ll find it.

So while I don’t really love this place, I appreciate what it’s done to me. It’s re-educated me on what’s important and what really matters, about what it means to actually gain an education. That it’s more than just the grades. That it takes a lifetime to figure out who you are and what you want. You’ll be treated the way you treat others; If you are too shy to seek out help, you’ll be ignored in return; if you can’t respect yourself, who else will; if you start bringing your full effort every day, slowly you will reap the rewards of your work, etc. etc. You learn all these lessons and more once you distance yourself from the filler and take control of your life.

In short, Berkeley has prepared me for reality. So after my time at Cal is done here, I’m ready for what lies beyond. That’s what I love.

I might have had a better time at Caltech or Stanford, getting pampered and bestowed the gifts of the privates. But I’d still be walking in the dark.

Do you love your college? Why or why not?

Viral infections are the worst. At least with diarrhea you know what you’re getting, and with constipation you know you’re eventually getting it out. With a virus you just have to hope that your immune system holds the fort and eventually beats the invaders into submission.

Now, thanks to some undertreated lettuce or soggy tomatoes or whatever the hell was in that salad, I’m currently in perpetual shitty mode, waiting for release. On the bright side, I remembered about this site. Maybe I’ll start writing to it again.